i feel like i am surrounded by pregnancy and babies right now, friends due to give birth soon, friends just finding out they’re pregnant, or friends trying to conceive. i have a particular soft spot in my heart for the new mamas. the really new ones. i remember all too well how amazing it was, on all levels really, to hold my new son in my arms after having just labored and given birth. how naive i was. not knowing how huge this shift in my world would be, how vulnerable i would feel (and still do feel, at times) bringing this child that i am responsible for into the world, how the intense love for a teeny, tiny, helpless person can be, at times, altogether beautiful and crippling all at the same time. how the hormones would cause me to cry a thousand tears at the tiniest heel-prick to check his bilirubin levels (a most minor procedure!), worrying whether he’d have to spend more time under the lights. how you want to give this child the world on a silver spoon, but will you be able to?
so, it is with these new mamas in mind, that i wrote the following letter. i sent it to two of my sweet friends within the last month when they were within days of giving birth. i figure i’d post it here, for the mamas i might not know personally but who could still benefit from reading it.
here it is. for you, soon-to-be mamas.
dear whoever you are,
without wanting to sound too dramatic (but, fair warning: i am going to!), i want to tell you guys that what you’re about to do, specifically give birth, is the coolest thing in the entire world. the world is abundant with the gory and scary stories. let me be one that stands out to tell you that it is amazing, empowering, exciting, and altogether surreal. no matter how it goes. because at the end of it you have, in your arms, YOUR CHILD. a baby that you and your husband made. the greatest gift of your life, no doubt (i am literally sitting here beginning to get weepy as i write this… it doesn’t help that i’m listening to our birthing playlist at the same time). your life will never be the same. but it is such a good, good thing. the sweetest change a life can undergo. ok, here come the tears. you will feel this insane, insane love for this baby and a new vulnerability that you’ve probably never felt before. these aren’t my words, but i’ve heard it said: it’s like your heart is walking around outside your body. you love your husband’s. but this love, the love between a mama and her baby. it’s altogether different and it is a sweet, sweet love. the sweetest, i think.