we decided to split the jersey shore trip into two legs by doing an overnight stay in nyc.  i love going to new york, steve's originally from chicago so he hasn't seen much of it, and the kids have been in and out at best.  thus, it was decided.  we stayed near madison sq. park and walked everywhere.  william and lindsey were troopers.  seriously.  schedules were upset in a huge way (the first night, we just kept walking... parker fell asleep in the stroller and i'm pretty sure it was 11 pm when we were saying, "look william and lindsey!  that's times square up there!").  we carried on nevertheless.  we discovered, as we arrived and unpacked the car in front of the hotel, that a bag was missing.  that bag was parker's.  (dammit parker!)  would you believe me if i told you that 3 out of the last 5 or 6 trips to nj we've forgotten a bag (usually lindsey's)?  you should believe me because i speak the truth.  at this point, i should be used to it but i was pissed.  after we ruled out its being stolen right under our noses off the sidewalk, we called home to nathaniel who indeed discovered it.  ON THE DRIVEWAY.  (you can't make this stuff up.  we are a freaking circus, i tell you.)  so, a few little things at baby gap and we were good to go.  

we met up with my dear friend alison (and her cutie daughter lucy!), steve and the kids happened upon obama's motorcade in the west village, and i enjoyed margaritas instead of waiting amongst those crowds.  i hung out with reagan (who is even more charming than you imagine!) and alison into the evening.  the following day, we had breakfast in bryant park, walked around central park, and took the kids to top of the rock (here's where i need to insert a funny story.  so, we'd just bought the rock tickets and were told to come back for the tour a half hour later.  we step outside to kill time and hear a bunch of girls begin SCREAMING as a black escalade pulls out of a parking garage.  we knew justin bieber had just performed on the today show a few hours earlier and it turned out, that was him (the story will grow with time into him having his window down and waving, "hey!  hey you!  bridget hunt!  but really, i could just make out his face through the tinted window.).  the group of screaming girls go sprinting after, and steve grabs lindsey's hand and... follows suit.  i'm not sure who was more excited--steve or lindsey.  william, parker, and i watched, as they're racing down the street thinking... what?  they're going to outrun bieber's car?  and then what'll they do when they get there?  it was hilarious.  my husband and a bunch of teen girls.  ripe.).  anyway, the weather was perfect and i think the trip was a grand success.  not to mention, it broke up our 7+ hour drive quite nicely.  

thanks, nyc!

we've returned home after being gone for two weeks.  it's nice to be back, although we're missing the family we've left.  we were in nyc for a quick 24 hours and then on the jersey shore the rest of the time. (you can see bits and pieces of the trip on instagram!  i'm itsahuntlife over there.)  we indulged in lots of pool and beach time, water ice, mack and mancos... and relaxing.  parker had his first ride on the carousel and lindsey rode the waves in on a boogie board like she was a regular 'ol beach bum.  it was such a nice time.

i'll be back real soon with lots of pictures.

annnnd... i can't believe july is already upon us.  what happened to june?!

(picture of cape may dunes taken via instagram)

well, it FINALLY got sort of fun and less yawn fest.  am i right?

they're in prague.  irish music plays.  if they do highland games in croatia... whatevs! says abc!  we do what we want!

date with arie.
+ eyewitness guide under her arm.  em's playin' the role of tour guide today.
+ today's buzzword is HOMETOWN.
+ i like her sparkly shorts though i'm not sure why everyone else is in winter garb while she's got shorts on?
+ arie's boring.  he has gone downhill for me.
+ NEWSFLASH: CHRIS HARRISON IN L.A. : ARIE WENT ON ONE DATE WITH A PRODUCER A MILLENIUM AGO
+ (can we all agree the hype about this whole issue was WAY more exciting than the actual issue?)
+ kind of funny when emily kept stressing: LOYALTY.  HONESTY.  TRUTH.  OPENNESS.  as all her fave qualities.  arie: "reflection of who i am//i agree//so honest//tell the truth//i wanna be more honest than honest//blah blah blah blah"
+ "my tattoo says CASSIE."  jk.
+ i still think it's weird he didn't mention it at least in passing.  yep, weird.  minus five for arie.
+ his hands caress the face/hair too much while kissing.  not into it.  minus 3 more.
+ "i feel like i'm on top of the world."  on top of a boat instead.  less cool.

date with john.
+ john is going golfing at a country club with that outfit.  not on a date in prague.
+ i'm calling him 'funeral-mass-card-john' from here on out because apparently a mass card scored him a lot of points even though it shouldn't have.
+ he's a 'data destruction specialist'????  kate's calling him a 'paper shredder.'
+ body language, meh.
+ a little snafu with the lock.  UH OH.  QUICK, LET US FIND HOW THIS IS ANALOGOUS TO OUR REAL LIFE RELATIONSHIP.

back at the hotel.
+ jef and ice age match.
+ ice age is going cray.

back to the date.
+ emily says, "right?!" a lot.  as in, "how beautiful is this castle?"  "RIGHT?!"
+ "i gotta lock up a hometown" -john.  whatever.
+ my brother in law went to bed at john's date and his last words muttered: "this is incredibly boring."
+ his ex "cheated with doctor dude"-- doctor dude?
+ i do like the way john talked about his family.  don't see 'em together though.

back at hotel.
+ chris still losing his mind.
+ sean is going to find one person in the city of prague by yelling her name?  right, abc.  i think you helped with this one.
+ (em is smitten with sean)

commercial break: ice age commercial--how apropos!

group date.
+ doug hasn't said dad yet!
+ amazing castle... blah blah blah... MY SON WOULD LOVE THIS.
+ legs touching is a problem??  i'm actually feeling badly for doug now.  this isn't going well.
+ a peck you'd give your grandmom.  doug, you should've SWEPT HER OFF HER FEET with that one.  instead, "thanks for that."  "yep."  and she just kept right on going with letting you go.  so awkward.
+ i feel sad for doug the dad.
+ chris: "i'm not intimidated by sean at all."  RIGHT.  and i'm a lamp.
+ i am soooooooooo not digging chris at all.  he's like a kid in love with an idol.  it's an obsession with emily.
+ chris is scared for people around him if he doesn't get a rose.  oh this is rich.  and then he cries.

date with jef.
+ puppet thing is kind of stupid (what is abc's obsession with bringing little kid stuff into this show?  muppets, pixar... this is a show for ADULTS.  ricki is probably not watching so STOP CATERING TO HER).  nevertheless... jef is good at the michael jackson puppet.
+ i also like how the date card read something about 'pulling on the heartstrings' but they're all surprised, "oh?!  a puppet shop!  maybe we should go in here?  this is totally random and unexpected!" mmhmm.
+ bought a gift for ricki!  plus ten!
+ i like that jef is actually asking real questions--living together, how soon for kids...
+ "i wanna date you so hard and marry the %#*&% out of you.  that was funny.
+ jef's my fave date so far.

cocktail party.
+ CHRIS'S MIND IS ABOUT TO EXPLODE INTO A MILLION TINY LITTLE PIECES.
+ emily looks like miss america.  it ain't good (anyone miss the forever 21 emily of brad's season?).
+ mass-card-john is gloating.
+ chris still losing his mind.
+ sean is nice and isn't gloating (i do like sean.).
+ chris has the weirdest head movements ever.
+ arie: "oh man this is intense."  spoken like a MAN WITH A ROSE ALREADY.
+ annnnd mass-card-john is gone once chris tells her "I BELIEVE IN YOU AND ME."

thoughts?

ice age totally freaks me out and will definitely construct an emily shrine in his bedroom after he goes home (which will be next week).  arie is meh.  sean is really nice and jef is funny.  the last two are my picks.

listen to the mustn'ts child.  listen to the don'ts.  

listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. 

listen to the never haves then listen close to me... 

anything can happen, child.

anything can be.

{shel silverstein}

parker.  we need to do something about that hair.  if you were a girl, i'd stick a little felted flower clip in it (oh wait, i did!  but it was really brief!) so fast it'd make your head spin.  but!  you're not a girl.  i can't bring myself to trim it yet, but... never say never.  so, 11 months, here we are.  one month away from your FIRST BIRTHDAY.  it's shocking, truly shocking.  i feel like mamas of one year olds are wise mamas who know all the tricks in the book, who never leave the house without the proper amount of diapers and wipes in the diaper bag, who predict naptimes perfectly.  then i realize, i almost am one of those mamas and yet i am none of those things and just started being your mom like the other day.  it's a head-scratcher.  a head-scratcher, indeed.

you are sweet, you laugh all the time, and you are starting to play independently so nicely.  you will sit on the floor and flip the pages (almost flipping each one by itself... a tricky feet for chubby little new hands like yours are) back and forth for a good twenty minutes and sometimes longer.  by yourself!  you don't need entertainment all the time, but you do like it when we're in the room with you while you do your thing.  you're also discovering that books are not food and i can sit and read to you.  your attention span doesn't always last the entire book but it sure can come close.  this is exciting as that'll be one of my favorite pasttimes with you.

you love when william and lindsey come home from school.  you love when anyone looks at you.  at a restaurant, at the grocery store.  you are desperate for someone to make eye contact with you.  then you'll smile at them and tuck your head into my chest like a little flirt.  it's adorable.

you're nearly perfect but can sometimes be a spaz come bedtime--lurching your body all about (if you didn't fall asleep nursing)... like you have restless leg syndrome but of your entire body.  you throw your head around, swing your arms and whack me in the face, scratch, kick.  i've considered a strait jacket but that feels wrong (but so right... do they come in your size?).

you love being held by mama.  i think you'd happily be held all day long by me (or dad).  at over 20 lbs. this isn't easy to do, but you still get a whole lot of it.  it's one of my favorite places for you to be--right there on my hip!

you are starting to like foods!  we've tried sweet potato, avocado, carrot, egg yolk, zucchini, greek yogurt, apple sauce and the only one that i'm pretty sure you did not like was the zucchini.  you didn't eat a ton of everything but you had some.  that's progress, my little man!  nursing's still your favorite though.

you're so loved, parker.  i mean it.  everybody loves you and i imagine that that is a real secure feeling for a little person like yourself.

love, mama

ps. next month.  12.  i get a little tight in the throat when i think about it.

well, let's see now.  it's official!  school's out!  summer's here!  we've done some lake-swimming, strawberry-picking (and then strawberry + peach shortcake eating of course), and you know... the usual.  parker is thrilled to have his siblings around most of the day now.  said siblings are thrilled to be done with school, and, well, we find a new normal.  a vacation normal.  you know?  it's an adjustment, but a good one.  we are down at the jersey shore spending some quality time with cousins and family.  i think this summer's going to be a good one.  with beaches and lakes and sun and berries and crickets and naps and sunscreen and tank tops and flip flops and most importantly, more mack and mancos pizza. 

funny story.  one of those 'kids say the darndest things' moments.  while strawberry picking, lindsey comes up to me (standing by the man who runs the farm--that's important) exclaiming how william keeps throwing back all the good strawberries she's picking and saying that they're not perfect and how she filled a container and he threw back like all of them and OMG SO MUCH WASTE.  awkward.  thanks lindsey!

christine of la mer ceramics makes the prettiest pottery, all with this beautiful turquoise color on the inside.  i love that it's all different shapes and sizes, but each have the same color on the inside.  the details in each piece are really cool -- i love pottery and her pieces are so nice.  eating your morning cereal can be a bit more sophisticated with one of her bowls, yes?

enter to win

$30 credit to la mer ceramics!

to enter:

{u.s. addresses only}

+ leave a comment (with email!)

additional entries:

{separate comments, please!}

+ favorite the shop on etsy

+ tweet, blog, facebook the giveaway

giveaway closed.  cara frazier is the winner!

can we just take a moment to appreciate this picture?  that was hilarious.  and his whole, "if i'd had more time to practice..."  how about laughing at yourself, ice age???  (see last week's post if you don't get the ice age reference.)

alright.

i watched it this morning with two babies who were creeping dangerously close to nap time, toys being strewn about, etc. etc. soooo, it's not going to be my best work.  but i'll give it a go anyway.

travis.

+ nice guy, but boring.  

+ "i can see myself with her."  then gets sent home.  why are they so candid in the interviews?!?  how about, "we'll see how it goes."  always so sure of themselves and BOOM the gavel comes down.  gavel?  did that make sense?

highland games.

+ chris is a GOOBER.  such a goober.  the butt/archery thing was hilarious.  "i may have lost but i won emily's heart that day."  may have?  pretty sure you did.  

+ sean's a nice guy.  he's all, "nah, no biggie," about his win.  a little humblebrag but still, nice guy.

+ sister kate is NOT an arie fan.  kissing her against a wall?!  bow chicka bow wow!

ryan.

+ "it says a lot that i was chosen."  OR, everyone eventually gets a turn for a one-on-one, ryan. -kate

+ he was definitely wearing a tank from the lululemon women's section.  

+ "ABC, please get lots of chesty naked shots of me getting ready." -ryan

+ his beard is just weird.  

+ he's putting his christian hat on again.  i just don't get it.  he's all, "hmm... what shall i be today?  macho-man-jock or jesus-lover?  ah!  i shall be jesus-lover today!"

jef.

+ i like his sense of humor.

chris.

+ GOOBER.  wait, i already said that.  

+ he's moving his head around like he's a bobblehead doll.  an ICE AGE BOBBLE HEAD DOLL.

+ he's getting a rose???  oh come on.

back to ryan.  one on one.

+ chesty, naked shots.  he's going to be happy when he watches this back.

+ 12 things about my future wife.  hopefully it's not seven pages with a guy waiting in the wings to talk to her.

+ she's sending him home.  he's thinking, "next bachelor??  can i talk to chris on my way out and set this thang up?"

+ trying to do his judo mind tricks / counseling session on her and get her to change her mind.  where's your motivationforcoaches.com quote now, eh ryan?!?!

+ turquoise shoes???  what the?

+ guys are celebrating when his bags are taken.  so funny.

arie. 

+ throwing around the L-word.  what what!

+ then the bachelor-happy music plays (they usually reserve that for the final episode!).

other thoughts.  

+ has jon had a one on one yet?

+ why'd doug the dad start crying?  i think a toy was whizzing by in front of my face when that happened.

+ i don't think it's OMG-SO-AMAZING that he has his g-parents funeral cards in his wallet.  sweet, yeah.  but wow?  no.

next week.  arie's past with a producer.  awwww yeah!

my picks: still like jef but for her?  not sure.  sean is probably most likely.  a little boring but kate says, "still waters run deep."  such a wise one, that kate.

your picks???

photo booth is best experienced with a fun song.

that's more like it.

enjoy!

summer!  it's nearly here!
some summer things i'm enjoying around the web...
(especially that black bathing suit top... i think it's sort of perfect.)

(from left to right)

black retro bikini top // dark floral bikini bottoms // striped beach cover up // straw fedora // floral headwrap // o'neill flats ($26!!) // dwell to do top // scallop edge shorts // dip-dye running shorts // striped maxi skirt // basic tank // cross band bikini top + bottom // ray-ban tortoise sunglasses

sunglasses shop has tons (and tons and tons!) of really nice frames, people!  summer's here, just about!  so pop on over there and get yourself a pair.  OR enter to win these ones picked by me (worth $57!)... le specs brand.  a little wayfarer-ish with a girly curve, am i right? 

so, enter to win

le specs offspring frames!

to enter:

{u.s. addresses only!}

+ leave a comment below--include e-mail! &

 like their facebook page (and post OFFSPRING on their wall)

giveaway closed.

elisha is the winner.  congrats!

missed the first 8 minutes.  again... parker's fault!

date with sean.
+ her teeth are glowing as they walk through the london park, no?
+ "he didn't know what big ben was?" -steve
+ good photographer?  the whole stretched out arm thing?  em, be more sparing with your compliments.

kalon, jef, and arie chatting back at the hotel.
+ kalon and emily's kids would have some major pearly whites.  too much.
+ jef wants a group date.
+ i didn't hear what kalon said about ricky that got jef hot and bothered.  dammit!

back to sean's date.
+ emily's voice is hoarse.  whatchu' doing behind the scenes, em?!
+ sean on the soap box (steve corrected me.  speaker's corner.).  oh man.  i'm embarrassed.  i mean, he did a good job on the spot, i guess?  but still.  awkward town.
+ this date looks pretty cool.  a date at the london tower?
+ "sean is totally my prisoner of love tonight" with a scratchy voice.  sounding all sorts of raunchy, ems!

back at the hotel.
+ kalon's had lip injections.

back to the date.
+ emily's make up looks good.
+ "hi, i'm emily.  HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?"
+  sean and emily seem promising.  a little yawn fest but promising nevertheless.

(can we just fast forward to the "get the f out" scene?)

group date.
+ meh.  acting.  i'm over these silly bachelor-meets-the-muppets-dollywood-acting-pretend-soap-opera things (that was a whole 'lotta stuff i just said there).
+ doug's cheesy in his big old "i'm a good sport, i can have a girl role, no problem!" thing.
+ whenever i see chris now... it's all this.
+ i made an audible "ehhh" when i saw greasy kalon on the screen.
+ "you can run along."  (?!?!)  i want to kick kalon in the balls sooooooooo badly.  2012, kalon.
+ doug.  an attempt at making a funny with the girl voice.
+ ewww.  kalon.  ewwwww.
+ ryan's got a total complex about arie.  he's too thrilled for arie to see him kiss emily.
+ i wouldn't be into that if i were emily.  the multiple kisses from ryan.  (but she liked it?  weird.)
+ abc zoom in on her and arie holding hands.  that's why they pay you the big bucks, eh cameraman?!
+ i'm starting to think ryan's a little funny at this point.  he's weird and overbearing but sort of funny too?  in like an overconfident, semi-obnoxious, but still sort of funny way?
+ the necklace.  "out of his pocket and with no box!" -steve scoffs
+ i don't even understand what kalon's saying.  'tired, sick mom?'  it doesn't even make sense.
+ DOUG THE DAD DOES NOT LIKE TO HEAR KIDS REFERRED TO AS BAGGAGE.
+ it makes doug the dad swear!  he doesn't like that either!  what if austin watches this?!
+ alright.  commercial break.  kalon's getting his ass kicked when we return.  i think he's got a major holier-than-thou complex and i want to beat it out of him with one of his helicopter blades.
+ "hey guys can everyone sit down for a second?"  serious LOL-ing.  doug is calling a meeting.  what is this?  emily is like shut up doug let me handle this.
+ BOOM.  bringing up kalon's line.  GO EMILY.
+ doug the dad trying to have a 'single parents rally' with emily.  she wants to be alone.  awkward and hilarious.  (doug, when will you learn that being single parents does not a relationship make?)
+ kalon calls himself a stand-up guy?  and i am a unicorn?
+ doug's all, "WHY AREN'T YOU HANDING OUT THE ROSE?  I TOLD YOU."
+ camera zooming in on unfinished beers and a sole rose.  DUH DUH DUHHHHH.

(this just in: dragons live in the buckingham palace.)

date with jef.
+ i'm digging his outfit (better than the socks thing that i somehow missed last week).
+ her 'surprise' for jef is a big can of 'why didn't you tell me about the baggage comment' whoopass.
+ hahahaha.  this english woman is cracking me up.  "nooo no no nooooo.  tea beforrrrre the milk!"
+ jef's commentary is funny.  "jean is really, really, really, really, really thorough."
+ i don't think either of them were digging that.
+ likening ricky to vintage louis vuitton... clever.
+ the london eye needs to dim their lights.  this is a date, not a surgery.
+ i'm kind of liking the vibe of their date.
+ that dessert looks good and they aren't even touching it.  how much wasted food is on this show?  i'd eat it.

cocktail party/rose ceremony.
+ who is this first guy?  i don't even know.  travis!  thank you for the banner across the bottom, abc.
+ arie in the hot seat!  i dunno, arie.  spinning this to be "all about us" as to why you didn't tell her.  i'm not so sure she's buying it.
+ steve keeps asking what ryan's wearing around his neck.  i told him.  SCARF, steve.
+ reciting romeo.  ryan.  i just don't know about you.  i mean, you seem like you mean well.  you're kinda goofy and weird.  but you've got all these weird things about you too.  i'm not coming down on either side.  gimme a few more episodes.
+ sean and emily slow-dancing?  to no music?
+ butterflies in her heart.  yep, em.  did sound cheesy.  i'll let it go.
+  wouldn't it be funny if chris came in and all straight faced was like, "the show's over.  emily's picked her man."  funnier in my head.
+ chris-ice-age-animal didn't get any talking time this week.
+ arie did not like ryan getting the rose.
+ oooh.  arie gets the last one.
+ alejandro's exit was graceful.

bitches get to go to croatia.  this is crap!  ikea blankets!  now the guys are just dying to stick up for emily.  "someone!  talk some crap about her!  or ricky!  so i can go tell her!  gimme my chance!"

alright.  overall i'm still on team arie & jef but i'm not DYING over anyone.  sean's nice but a little boring.  (has anyone been watching since trista and ryan?  cause i have.  and i was DYING over ryan by this point eaaaasy.  so, these guys gotta step up their game if they want to impress ME.  WHICH IS WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT.)

alright.  give it to me.  thoughts?

so, i had this crazy idea!

(not really that crazy.)

asking some questions

of you!

yes, you!

i've done it before, but not real in depth.

so, let's do it.

good?

i'll answer too.  to keep it real, ya know.

where you from?!  where do you live now?

(i'm originally from south jersey (near philadelphia) and now boston-area!)

male/female?  age?

(are there any male readers out there?  show yourself!  i'm 27.  a girl.  you knew that.)

how'd you discover my blog?  long-time reader?   new?

(most blogs i discovered through random internet clicking.  maybe that's the same for you, but otherwise, give it up!)

what do you do?  for work?  for fun?

(i'm a stay-at-home mom these days but in the past i've worked at a law firm + retail.  what i'd like to do is more telling: writing!  photography!)

are you religious?  atheist?  something in between?

(i might say i'm religious but i'm afraid of the connotations that go with it.  can i say spiritual without seeming too hippy?  i believe in jesus.  i believe in grace, forgiveness, and life after all of this.) 

what's your favorite song?  band?  book?

(i couldn't even begin to answer this!  but you all know i'm a fan of paul simon, james taylor, fleet foxes, ray lamontagne...and the like.  first book i ever fell in love with was prince of tides, but i've fallen for a lot more since...)

what's your favorite vacation spot?

(in the northeast?  lake winnipesaukee.  the beach. anywhere?  i love santa barbara, i love italy, switzerland, israel.  basically any place.  send me.)

what would you like to see more of on the blog?

(this is really a question for you.  but give it to me!)

are any of you famous?

(i just KNOW ryan gosling is reading my blog!  show yourself, ryan!!!)

(oh!  anonymous commenting allowed today.  eesh.)

while i fear parker may develop a complex since every
little, teeny, tiny thing he does is met with a cheering squad... 

it's pretty sweet how much love is poured out on the little man... 

and lately, it's in the form of being pushed around on his little bike.

thank you william and lindsey!

(they are so good to him.)

lindsey played the part of laura ingalls wilder at school.  it was actually seriously cool.  i walked into the classroom to all the students in a circle, frozen in a certain position.  they were dressed for the part (from harriet tubman, to jfk jr., to harry houdini...).  to hear a short bio on the person, you walked up to their desk and pushed a button.  they unfroze, gave their bio, sat down, and froze again in the same position as before.  i loved it.  jordan went to the prom!  he and his date looked fabulous (i loved her dress), and the day was perfect for it.  it was, of course, before the rain came and stayed for multiple days in a row (good news though... looks like it's clearing out today!).  we took william and lindsey out of school for a day and met up with friends of ours in boston (including rachael!).  we walked all around beacon hill, hearing bits and pieces of its history from a friend of ours who knows it like the back of his hand.  

and then... came the rains.

i wore a sweater!  bleck!  when we've already had 90 degree weather, it feels altogether wrong and strange to be pulling a sweater over my head... and i took the kids to the library (parker remained in pajamas for like 48 hours straight).  we did some reading, lindsey did some more farm-planning, and steve took a few naps with the little boy.  i love catching them napping.  

and that's the latest around the hunt house.

alright.  i missed the first 12 minutes (errggg!).  i blame this one on parker!

so, here goes.  she's already into her date with doug.  anddddd i begin.

doug.
+ i started a charity.  (what he failed to mention is that he started the charity the day before he came on the bachelorette just waiting to drop that little nugget in emily's sweet little blonde head.)
+ how many times can doug say the word 'dad' in five minutes?
+ scolding the boys?  he's so patronizing.  scolding.  boys.  you're not a dad here, dougie!

group date card comes out.
+ who is nate in the red shirt?  i think they JUST brought him on like two minutes ago.  never seen him before.

back to doug.
+ "as much as i love all of today... i love MY SON THE MOST."
+ "my only imperfection.  i didn't trim my toenails enough.  i didn't wash her car enough.  i cut my son's crust off too perfectly.  i read him too many stories."  PLEASE DOUG.  CHEESEBALL.  GOODBYE.
+ i'm winning this rose is for me and my son!  my son!  i have a son!
+ "if emily wants a kiss from doug..."  talking in third person is a deal-breaker.

group date.
+ ryan's hair is out of control.  what'll it look like after sailing?  you krazy kat, ryan!
+ i hope the boom whacks kalon right out of the boat.  while a shark is swimming by.
+ sean played football.  so he can BRING IT to the boat like he BROUGHT IT to the field.
+ go team yellow (it's got jef and arie... my faves.)
+ uh-oh.  guys are cussing.  team red's in trouble.  don't they know the tortoise and the hare story?  (if doug was their dad, they'd probably know it.  i bet doug reads to his boy allllllll the timeeeeeeee.)
+ uh-oh, now team yellow's in trouble.  never mind.  they win.  phew.  palms were sweaty.
+ is head-wound charlie crying in the back seat?
+ i like emily's sweater.
+ ryan tries to pass chauvinism off as cute flattery.  it ain't cute, ry-guy-krazy-hair.
+ arie's her fave, i think.
+ JEF.  jef is just too cool.  i mean, ems... i like you.  but come on.  it's like the song, "i'm a little bit country.  i'm a little bit rock and roll."  i don't see it working.  you're going to dollywood, he's going to coachella.  you pickin' up what i'm puttin' down?
+ jef: "like, i like like you.  like, i'm like nervous, but i like..."
+ ryan has concerns?  like emily's workout routine isn't vigorous enough?  "i not trying to impress you, i'm trying to make an impression on you."  he got that on motivationforcoaches.com, i think.
+ is ryan a tv evangelist now?  this guy!  so many hats!

two-on-one.
+ really.  who is nate?  where did he come from?
+ is this "kwin-oh-ah?"  NUH-UH.  THIS IS TOO GOOD.  (it's keen-wah new-to-the-show-nate!)
+ "what do you want me to know about you?"  "i like fiber." -nate
+ crying over his brother and friends?  sweet, yes.  a tad overemotional?  YES.  it was the wine.
+ nate's eyes are boring holes into her skull as she pins the rose on jon.
+ nate's psyched to get back to his bro.

cocktail party.
+ i can correct lil ricky's homework in mah prom dress, check me out!
+ fake ponytail?
+ (it's a prom ROMPER, bridget.)  didn't know till i saw the full-bod shot.  my bad!
+ ryan is charming, athletic, blessed by god, AND sticks his finger in the socket to achieve that rockin' hair style.  ok, i'll move on from the hair.
+ pony-tail guy.  why haven't we seen more from him?
+ ABC, did you hear that?  ryan just signed himself up as next bachelor!  and we'd all be so lucky!
+ doug-the-dad, stop tallllkkkking pleeeease.
+ doug and chris.  hackles are up!  doug is playing mind games!  chris is goin' crazy!  this is ugly!  chris doesn't know what this fight he started is even about.  "i'm not young!  you're too humble!  I DON'T BELIEVE YOU."  and doug: "believe what?"
+ "you don't get my competitive juices flowing, chris!  you're like a fly!  i crush your skull." (roll your r's!)
+ biggest disappointment of this episode: helicopter guy is like a no show.  come on ABC.

chris and emily's chat before the ceremony.
+ YOU TWO SHOULD JUST GET MARRIED (did ya'll hear?  chris got a divorce.).
+ she picks up helicopter's picture first?  he's like a non-entity.

rose ceremony. DUH DUH DUH (that was dramatic music).
+ chris looks like the tall skinny animal in the ice age movies.  i don't even know what animal it is.
+ ryan gets a rose?  blah.  that's how i feel about that.
+ KALON GETS A ROSE?  bright side: maybe he'll talk smack again next week for our entertainment.  but really??
+ i kind of feel bad for long-haired ponytail guy.  he seems nice.

next week.
+ "i think you're going to retract that statement." -ryan
+ and f-bomb!

until then...

so?  thoughts?  give em to me straight!

(and if you do your own bachelorette recap, link to it in the comments!  i wanna see!)

lindsey's in fourth grade now.  william's in sixth.  i remember william in fourth fairly well--after all, it was only two years ago.  it wasn't terribly memorable in that no big drama went doooowwwwnnn, but i remember bits and pieces nevertheless.  that's a part of my job description.  remembering the bits and the pieces.  one of those bits that stands out is his nerves.  he is one nervous fellow, that william.  he's just one of those types who likes to fit in, to be liked, to wear the right clothes.  like i said, a nervous fellow.  not entirely comfortable in his own skin.  lindsey, well, she's so different.  she's more like nathaniel.  the two of them, for the most part, walk to the beat of their own drum.  i cheer this trait on, usually.  i mean, when it goes so far as scoffing at the rest of the rat race's need for hygiene, i might not be cheering quite so loudly.  but, really, i think that that trait is huge.  mostly beneficial.  wearing what she wants to wear, doing what she wants to do, happy to be, well, herself.  she doesn't overthink things.

now she's in fourth grade.  and i will say, despite her whole, "this is me, take me or leave me" stance on life, fourth grade has its share of drama.  ho boy, does it ever.  i mean draaaa-ma.  you've got to say it like that.  really emphasizing each syllable, drawing it out like so: DRAAAA-MA!

william used to come home from his fourth grade day.  it'd be something like this:  i'd ask, "how was your day?"  he'd respond, "good."  "anything interesting happen?"  "nah."  "want a snack?"  "ok."

now ready for a pendulum swing?  hold on tight!  lindsey comes home.  "how was your day?"  "well!  naomi told us that we stole her song and then she said, "talk to the hand!" and then the teacher yelled at us!  and then lynn said 'it's totes obvi that you guys stole our song.'  and then at recess i didn't want to practice our dance, so jill got mad at me!  and then i went to swing and they told me i wasn't in their group anymore.  and then erin told me and rachel that she was rating our wardrobe and that we got 3 out of ten.  and i just told her i didn't care and then i went to play on the monkey bars.  but then heidi came and said that i could jump rope with her only if i switched seats with her at lunch.  and can i go to a sleepover at sophia's house this friday night?"  and i'm just now interjecting for the first time (just making sure you're following), "same sophia you got in a fight with last week?"  "yep!  that's the one!"

her daily breakdown of the day could make your head spin.
it makes mine spin every day.

girls and boys.  they couldn't be more different.

and speaking of girls and friends and non-friends and fighting and drama... here's a little ditty she made up with her friends.  it was a group thing.  till they got in a fight and split up.  like the backstreet boys?

warning: it'll be in your head all day.

+ i don't like being referred to as ''sweetie.''  pet names in general aren't my thing.  particularly by men or by people my own age.  i mean, i really don't like it.  i'm kind of surprised at how much i chafe against it, in fact.  YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.  next time it happens, ima slap somebody.

+ i trust you've all seen this video by now.  for the love of god, if you haven't, watch it immediately.
and if isaac and his fiance happen upon my blog, PLEASE INVITE ME TO YOUR WEDDING.

+ some of you asked about my skirt in this post.  i tried to find it, but alas, could not!  though, i'm digging sooo many of forever 21's a-line skirts this season (where i got mine!).  here's a few more favorites.

1 // 2 // 3

+ i don't like when store cashiers ask, all blasé-like, "what's your e-mail address?" as you finish making your purchase.  not, "can we have your e-mail address so we can put you on our 'we-send-you-shit-you-don't-want-too-often list?"  i mean, they should be asking if you'd like to get on that list instead of acting all 'gimme your e-mail' as some prerequisite to handing you your shopping bag.

+ on twitter yesterday i caught wind of a les miserables movie coming out next winter!  starring anne hathaway, russell crowe, and hugh jackman.  this makes my classical-loving husband very happy.  you want to see the trailer?

+ a couple of you asked my take on the time magazine cover.  i know!  old news at this point.  nevertheless here's what i have to say: to each his own.  i don't care that she's still breastfeeding her older son (in fact, i checked out her blog and she seems like a pretty down-to-earth mama.  did you know she adopted a boy from africa and breastfed him too?  whatever you think about her, that is pretty cool.).  what i do care about is how they portrayed it.  him standing on a stool, her hand-on-hip stance, the incendiary title "are you mom enough?"  to be sure, their nursing is far more nurturing and intimate than the photographer showed.  but, i get it, they wanted to sell magazines.  whatever.  but here's a question:  when will the media stop trying to pit women against each other?

and that is all.

have a fabulous weekend.  i mean it!