bachelorette, part 9.

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

alright.  the season's nearly over.  down to the last two!  and this episode brings us: curacao!  helicopters (finally!).  cliff-jumping!  private islands!  nothing we've ever seen before on this show!

first thoughts:
+ little ricki doesn't get to come to curacao?
+ tears over arie's little 'intro' but no one elses?  mehhh this just makes me think he's totally the one she picks which kind of disappoints me.  JEF.  JEF.  JEF.
+ emily + ? in the sand.  waves come wash away the ?.  abc, you so artsy!

date with sean.
+ this is our first taste of a helicopter.  (or second, maybe?)  by this point in the season this is usually helicopter number 227.  but yet they are always so surprised.  "a helicopter!?  for meee?!?"
+ as far as private islands go, this one is not that attractive from birds-eye view.  barren.
+ sean forgot what he was going to say.  i think the word is LOVE, sean.  that was awkward.
+ he wrote ricki a letter.  alright, that's sweet.  but it just seems a bit contrived.  like he'll know that's the way to her heart so he's going to pen one no matter what it takes.  jef's seemed genuine (on the ranch) but maybe that's just cause i'm biased at this point.
+ fantasy suite card.  i'm going to spend the night "TALKING WITH YOU."  hear that, ricki?  MOM IS NOT HAVING SEX.

date with jef.
+ i am sooo digging jef's questions: "do you think i'd make a good parent?"  "where would we live?"  legit questions.  you so rarely see that on this show (and subsequently so few of these relationships wind up successful) so it's really refreshing.
+ painting analogy.  ohhhh, jef.
+ she says jef makes her laugh.  this is my number one.  the choice is obvious: JEF.  LAUGHTER.
+ jef's response to the fantasy suite--so well-spoken.  but i think she wants him to be more like, "PLEASE.  I WANT YOU.  LETS DO THIS THING."  instead of being all gentlemanly.  she strikes me as the type who needs more of a badboy.
+ "bridle these passions."  oh gosh.

date with face-grab.
+ miami beach coverup?
+ the swimming with dolphins=cool.
+ face-grab.
+ i think she's gonna let her loins make this final decision for her and unfortunately her loins are leading her to arie (which i just don't get.  he's not that cute.).
+ i looove her white dress/belt combo and her hair straight.
+ 6:30 AM she WISHES?  what time does lady ricki wake?!
+ good answer on being little r's buddy first before 'father figure'
+ you make me "feel like a man".  i think that's such emily-lingo.  the words she wants to hear.
+ arie doesn't even get the suite card?!  cause she's too worried what she'll do?  ok, he's so the final one and i'm just pissed.
+ if he's not the final one, this is gonna be hard for jef to watch back.  but, let's be honest, he is the final one.

rose ceremony.
+ i like that she is emotional and not taking it lightly.
+ i'm trying to guage her reaction to their tv messages.  she's pretty much the same each time though.
+ horse-hair ponytail.
+ i like jef's outfit.

next week.  jef goes home and she tells him before the very end.  dammit.


  1. i accidentally read the spoiler last night re: who wins. whoops! i want to tell you. but i won't.

    sean's date was almost as boring as he. i think i fell asleep.

    jef and his metaphors...i thought he was above that. so disappointing. i thought it was cute when she said "i wanted to turn him down!".

    hahaha, yeah, does ricki wake up at 5:00? do they have roosters? what the heck?

    i was laughing out loud during arie's "outtakes" at the end.

    can we skip "the men tell all" next week and just cut to the chase? come on.

  2. I read the spoilers, too. Mwahahaha. Girl, you are so RIGHT ON with this recap. "Face grab" makes me laugh every.single.time.

    I'm kinda looking forward to Men Tell All. DRAMA. :)

  3. ok so i love reading your recap every week. but i was dying for you to say something about her forehead and how it NEVER MOVED.

    face grab is too much i can't even watch when they kiss so i pretty much missed their whole date.

    and what the hell is with the finale being on a sunday. and a sunday that i have a wedding to go to so i can't watch this fake engagement.

    go team jef.

  4. hilarious-who needs to watch it. (never seen it in my life-but still get what is going on-good going!)

  5. I am super impressed with the dedication of having this ready to go and the new TV changes at your house! I am not feeling Arie either, maybe she just reallllllllllly likes race car drivers?

  6. I was totally waiting for you to say something about the tiki torches at the rose ceremony. So Survivor-esque. Or does that happen in every series and I'm just surprised by it because I'm new to this?

  7. You are making me sad that Jef might get booted! How about the constant buzzing of bugs or something the whole time? So annoying!

    I don't miss Sean too much, sloppy kisser, just sayin.

  8. aaah this is my favorite post today (along with these fabulous comments!) i actually think she might not pick either (pulling a brad). the previews for the finale show her talking to her mom and she's all regal and like "that's why i suggest putting off any sort of engagement." and for every.single other finale, they've at least shown a snippet of the girl in the wedding dress, the beach in the background, and an unidentifiable man on one knee. no such snippet for emily!

    either way, i'm with ya. jeff and his awkward hair totally have my vote.

  9. I was over face grab until I saw his out takes at the end. Bless him. They were adorable.

    Mike can't wait to watch men tell all with me...although he'd tell you otherwise, we are so pumped.

  10. i am so rooting for Jef! i loved that he was the only one wearing a tie...and asking all real questions, loved that. I felt mehh about Arie, but his outtakes at the end were pretty funny. I'm still Team Jef though!

  11. you're all talking about the outtakes! i didn't see them. skips them--DUMB.

  12. I couldn't help myself and I went to Reality Steve's website. WOWzers.

    Normally I wouldn't read the spoiler but I'm disappointed that the finale is airing on Sunday instead of Monday. I won't be able to watch it on Sunday night! sniffs

  13. She should have kept sean. He's definitely the best one when all the cameras are off and they're down to real life!

  14. I really like Jef!!! I'd be more afraid of what I'd do with him than Arie! I'm blogging and driving so I'm cutting this short!

  15. Sooooo team Jef. The hometown visits convinced me. I don't see Ricki fitting into Arie's family (so awkward) but I saw her naturally blending with either Jef's or Sean's. I was sad to see Sean go because I thought he was definitely more real then Arie. The lust will fade and she will be at home missing Arie as he travels the world and little Ricki is in school.
    I kind of think she is going to pull a Brad too.
    Okay that was a lot of crazy random thoughts but this show makes my mind go like 100 miles an hour.

  16. Listen, you don't pick Arie based solely on his scary Mom. That's just obvious. That will be Ricki's Grandmother...or, she could have a million aunts and cousins. Not to mention a cool Dad.
    Ugh, Emily.

  17. I read on some blog a few weeks ago that she doesn't pick anyone and is actually dating Chris Harrison! Ha! That would be awesome, and after the previews for the finale I kinda think she that she doesn't choose one. I'm dying to look at the spoilers, but I'm resisting for now.

  18. i think she might pull a brad, but i also really think she chooses jef. i haven't read the spoilers but word on the utah street is that jef wins it. we'll see eh?

    and you are always hilarious and spot on with these recaps. well done, bridge. :)

  19. seriously. what time does ricki wake? and does this mean i am going to wake at 4am when i have a baby? i'm scared, if so. for everyone at our house.

    i still think she's going to choose jef.

  20. I will cry if it's not Jeff. He reminds me of my boyfriend in a way and I would just be so happy if she picked him!

    Also, Emily is really good at keeping it together when she cries. She still looks beautiful. Id be a mess with mascara everywhere and I'd be hiccuping and just being not attractive at all, lol.

  21. SOO mad that Sean went home!! I really think she picks Jef, especially since she told him that she thought of him when she was making Ricki lunch and that made her happy. Kind of annoyed though- Jef seems like a great guy, but totally not for her. Also- he has girl hands...

    Even more mad at myself, since I wanted to stop watching like 5 episodes ago, but here I am still glued ABC Monday nights. Grrr.

  22. Such an IDIOT if she doesn't pick Jef. I'm almost thinking going polygamist, so I can have him along with Wyatt.

  23. HAHA this is amazing. I agree 100% with every statement

  24. I have still seen rumors that she is having an affair with Chris Harrison! He is divorcing his wife of 18 years. Google it, I'm not kidding. Terrible.

  25. my child is not going to be allowed to wake up before 9am AT LEAST. i mean. good god. otherwise S is getting up with the children.

    thats all i have to say about that. because i was most effected by that comment.

  26. Our house was obsessed with Sean...and pissed that she basically made him say "I love you" if she was just gonna let him go.

  27. LOL "horse hair ponytail"

    Love it - stop by and say hi sometime!

  28. I really hope Jef is the next Bachelor, even though he's probably too young and not douchey enough to be picked by the casting people. He's so freaking adorable. I hated him at first (the pompadour, really), but he's definitely grown on me. Arie is a skeez. And I think she's a huge B for guilting Sean their entire date into finally saying "I love you" just so she could dump him at the end. She was practically begging for the L-word their entire date. I pretty much hate her after last night's episode, but I'll keep watching to find out what happens to sweet little mormon Jef.

  29. team jef all the way! :)

  30. Apparently I'm the worst reality tv show watcher ever, or maybe I'm exactly what they want their viewers to be, because I totally cried at the end of the show along with Emily. Seriously, what is wrong with me!?!

    And I totally want her to pick Arie now so that Jef is a free, eligible bachelor...

  31. Wait, what? Who do you think she will pick?????? Didn't you think Arie looked too sweaty? :)

  32. Jef makes me swoon. It's embarrassing. And I totally agree - laughter is so very, very important. I liked Arie at first but he's gone so far downhill for me. Emily don't let your loins do the talking!

  33. Bridget, first of all- i'm a first time commenter. Thank you for doing these recaps- i watch this in Australia through sneaky US itunes ways and noone else here has seen it = noone to talk sbout it with! This saves me! I lread it as i watch. And I laugh along...a lot!it's actually as if au was watching with a friend. Love it.

    Jef, you were so dorky this episode. What happened to cool, quirky, sexy-touchy Jef of Utah Ranch days? This Jef was just awkward, young. 'bridle my passions?' cringey cringe cringe. She'll pick Arie- despite his mother. I think there is a lot of spark between them and he's a nice guy. Just by-the-by, Emily looked really plastic in the horse hair pony tail look, no? Much prefer her more natural look. She really is gorgeous, you can't stop watching her.

  34. you are gonna be happy with the winner, Reality Steve is always right.

  35. btw, "bridle your passions" is totally a mormon-ism. haaaaa

  36. I must be the only one of your readers that doesn't hate on face-grab! (Though I must say, accurate name.) I love love love Jef too...but I think I'm slightly more Team Arie. Maybe the race car driver thing does it for me too.

    Confession: I know I don't comment very often...but I legitimately started watching this show because of your recaps!

  37. Love your recap. You made laugh and laugh. Team Jef all the way. :)

  38. Yep reality Steve says Jef.

    But actually isn't ALWAYS right, he said Brad picked Chantel during Emily's season.. So I HOPE he is right, but his system is sometimes flawed!!

    We will see!!

    PS- You are thoroughly entertaining through and through!!!


  39. why doesn't anyone EVER hand her a tissue when she cries?! heartless cameramen.....

    That ish at the end with Sean was sooo sad! I really had no idea who she would pick!! I could see her with all of them.
    You could tell he wanted to cry but there was no way he was going to do it in front of the cameras. Ugh. so sad.
    At this point I really don't know. It's hard to make a decision because we're only shown what ABC WANTS us to see. So, I find myself going back and forth between Arie and Jef. I just don't know....
    Also, someone had leaked before that she ended up with Sean so I think all of those "spoilers" should be taken with a grain of salt.

  40. i'm a little bothered that the commenter before me basically just ruined the ending of this show. i love reading the comments as much as your awesome posts but didn't want any spoilers and was going to avoid googling it.

    that wasn't even what i wanted to comment! it's frustrating isn't it that jef is so awesome but it does seem like they aren't really meant for each other....


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