my crazy thoughts on being a mom of a newborn.

that's parker-man's big feet.  pretty cute huh?
taken by my friend sara.

so, while i've been doing the mom thing for almost five years, 
the newborn thing is entirely different.
when i came along, my other four were resilient.  
i wasn't afraid of their impending deaths every second of the day.

so here are my thoughts... my crazy ones
that will either make you feel totally validated cause you've had the same
or you'll be like, "that bridget.  she's freaking loony!"
i'm letting you in on my one month post-partum head.
this should be interesting.

his swaddle falls on the ground.  oh!  that one's dirty now.  get a new one.
there is definitely diptheria on that very floor tile.

your hands touched the shopping cart and then you use organic hand sanitizer.  
can i touch my baby now?  it's organic hand sanitizer so it's ok for him, or is it?
or, because it's organic, does it really do the trick with the germs?

there was a cough at target.  two aisles down.  does pertussis travel that far?

lindsey hands me the burp cloth.  when was the last time she washed her hands?

his poop.  it's a shade closer to green than yellow now.  virus?  something i ate?  
what is wrong with him?!

basically, i'm a crazy person, fo sho.


  1. ha my aunts were all talking about this at a family thing this weekend: how having babies turns you into a little worrier. but it's alright, i can understand why you wouldn't wanna lose this sweet little one :)

  2. Oh, I know exactly how you feel! It's crazy how one suddenly sees danger in everything. Keep smiling, you're doing great!

  3. Aw Bridget. That is one cute baby! (The toes! Oh my.)

    P.S. You don't sound crazy to me but then again I'm not a Mom. So maybe that makes me the crazy one...

  4. wow. this is totally something i've never thought of. i've been a mom for 4 and a half years, but having never had Piper Jane at home, or with me at the grocery store, or at play dates, or in the nursery next to my bedroom at night, i've never known how i'd react to each little thing. even when i'm with her, she is always more under the care of someone else. i wonder what i'd be like with my baby.

    our situations are/were different, but kind of similar in that we've been parents for a while without fully experiencing parenting.

    i think you are doing a good job bridget. and parker is a wee cutie.

  5. his sweet little feetsies!!

    oh i was all ready for the crazy... but that just seemed like normal thoughts for me. and i don't have a baby. i'm headed for the looney bin myself.

  6. When Westley was 3 weeks old we ventured out of the house for like the first time to go to Drew's grandparents anniversary party.

    While there a 7 year old sneezed a big nasty drippy sneeze all over him.

    I literally nearly punched a the kid in his wet nose.

  7. I'm a germophobe but childless so I can only imagine how it will be when I do have one.

    Not to mention, when my nephew was an infant and I was babysitting him at night, I would literally stand next to his crib the whole time he was sleeping because I was so paranoid that he would stop breathing. (this happened to a friend's child so I think that's the reason for the damage)
    I'm afraid this might translate to me wanting round the clock sleeping-baby watchers to make sure my child does not stop breathing. And I wish I was kidding. So no, you are definitely not crazy. :)

  8. I was the same way and I probably looked up poop in the books 15 times. Try the book Baby 4-1-1. It is informative and easy to read and even makes jokes about what you are more than likely thinking....

  9. I am so with you! I marched right out of a store becauase I heard a man cough. And now I am super crazy with the sanitizer because of an article I read. I am probably going to wash off my skin soon because I wash my hands so much! Nope, you're not crazy... or wait, we both are!!!!!

  10. ahh, you're hilarious. just keep in mind, you do not have to be perfect. it's good for them to be exposed to some germs :) and I think that the 3 second rule applies :)


  11. The crazy happens when you hold a mirror up to his nostrils. Just to make sure he is breathing.
    Usually around the same time you transition to a crib.
    I was close.
    Love this pic. love.

  12. You're not crazy. My sister did all of the above for all THREE of her babies. Who were all born within four years of each other. I feel like this is all normal.

    Or both you and my sister are crazy. Take your pick.

  13. I think the baby has super reach and yanks out part of your brain and heart when they come out.

    It's amazing the number of times you can envision impending doom for your baby in 24 hours. It's like 16554654654654654 million. To the 27 power.

    I still wake up and stare at him on the monitor twelve times a night. I had to mount in on the ceiling cause he figured out my game and would smack it so I couldn't see him. Demon.

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  15. This cracks me up. Babies turn us all a little crazy in one form or another. With me 2nd &3rd, I'm a little more laid back (so you can probably count on that if you're in for it again), but it's okay to be really careful too... just don't drive yourself crazy! You are such a darling mom, worrying already, and that's just what we do. He is such a dreamboat!

  16. oh no! this makes me so worried to have a bebe of my own! I have this "crazy" sorts of thoughts all the time already.. I'm screwed! My poor husband!!!

  17. Ha! I am a quasi germaphobe and people laugh that I'll either end up being way worse than I am now or completely "eh" about germs. This makes me think I will be the former.

  18. There was a cough in Target. Two aisles down.

    You are such a good mama to a newborn. And funny as ever.

  19. I'm pretty sure this is all very normal. Sounds to me like you're doing a great job at the newborn thing :)

    I remember a post from a while back where you explained your fears about having your biological child and I was wondering how you were feeling now that Parker is here ? Does having him put things in perspective ? Is the love different ?

    It does sound like everybody is adjusting so well :) I'm so happy for you. Parker is adorable.


  20. More germs the better for little babies (obviously within reason!!). A healthy newborn has an extremely resilient immune system that needs challenging and building up everyday. Also, if you have a pet, there's no escaping those pesky germs! I have a dog and a 13 month old baby and she hasn't been sick once - something I put down to the dog regularly licking her face and pacis flying all over the place!|

  21. You're not a good mom if you don't call your husband in to examine green-ish poop with you.


    I tried to be germaphobe mom in the beginning, but Mike just kept doing stupid germy shit around the baby, so I had to let it go.

  22. i'm so the opposite of that, but i'm sure having a newborn would make me the EXACT same. : ) good luck, girl. you've got this. : )

  23. I have to say I was the opposite and still am... but maybe thats because I had a newborn as a nanny. Pretty cute little toes!

  24. I will probably think those very same over-the-top thoughts, so I totally understand you all the way! =)

  25. you are totally crazy. but it's okay, we all are at first.

  26. Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm not a mom and I've been known to wake p in the middle of the night and think the dresser knobs look like eyes looking back at me!....So who am I to judge?! LOL I'm going through the "Change" though. It's a hormone thing. Yours might be too...ya think?! ^_^

  27. I'm pretty sure these thoughts mean you're a fantastic mother. Parker is a lucky guy!

  28. Nothing gets me worried more than the poop, though I, too worry about anything and everything (this wears off to a more normal level if worry the older and more independent they get--I'm pretty laid back with S by now) with a newborn. I think the poop color/consistency is so scary because I know I have a direct effect on it with what I do/don't do as his only source of nourishment. I'm also fanatically worried that he's not eating enough, even as he get fatter by the day and weighs more than his 6 month old cousin at half her age.

    And @E, you totally have to make your hubby look at the green poo with you, I agree! What if your worrying pushed you over the edge and you're only imagining that it's green??

  29. Just googled "Green poop" a week ago for my friend - I'm sure you are totally normal. Well, maybe not totally :p

  30. motherhood had the same effect on me!
    i could hear, and subsequently worry about a sneeze/cough/stuffy nose from a mile away...

    the world just seemed huge and dirty and germy and potentially deadly...

    it's gotten better... but it's certainly not like it was before i had a baby!!


  31. Normal, of COURSE! And don't worry about poop color (unless it's blood red). My pediatrician actually told me that she didn't want to hear about what color my kid's poop was. Oh and I have a friend whose baby has basically always pooped only green.

    As for germs, I never worried much about those -- remember how much great immunity your milk is giving him! But I did worry every second that my babies would stop breathing, which is another sort of crazy and also totally normal.

    This will ease up and then will morph into the kind of worry that you are already used to with the other kids but that new parents need to learn -- like how to leave them at school, trust that they will be ok in someone else's car, etc. This is the stage I am just getting to, but you already have the experience with.

  32. Yes this sounds crazy. The best is yet to come: Sleep Deprivation Superstition. When you get to the point where you're past your breaking point and the kid still wakes up every 3-4 hours, I start practicing really loopy superstitions. Examples:
    Me: Where's the yellow swaddler?
    Spouse: Uh, I think he spit up on that one.
    Me: Oh no! Nononono! Last night he use that one and he went 5 hours without waking up! I know it was bc the yellow one is the softest! Clean it now or die!


    Me: are you singing James Taylor before laying him down?
    Spouse: Yeah, "Carolina".
    Me: Oh no! Nonononono! He likes "Copperline"! He always lays down better for that song. Now he'll never sleep!

    Coocoo! Seriously, my kids are 3 and 1 and I still do it.

  33. welcome to the life of a momma to a newborn...it doesn't end either.. Makena will be one and I still go in and check if she's breathing at all hours. If she doesn't poop I freak out...if she poops too much I freak...ugh...the life.

    But I wouldn't change it!

  34. ha ha ... you made me smile :) ... a momma's heart is always on, never lets up and no matter where the kiddos go, there is always a piece of your heart walking around outside of your body.

  35. I was OBSESSED with the color of my newborn's poop - for real...color, consistency, whether there was too much or not enough. I logged it - for real. Don't feel badly...I wasn't even brave enough to take her to a Target.

  36. Awesome post. First, lovelove the picture, those feet are kiss worthy. And I am in the "ohthankgoodness I am not alone" camp on this one. We needed an endless supply of baby hats because they kept touching the ground, or someone's unwashed hand, etc. I was obsessed with her temperature constantly worried she was either too cold or too hot. There seems to be a very fine line of about 2 degrees that you can walk, and I was convinced if I went above or below it, certain death would follow. You are not crazy :)

  37. ha ha. I am totally the same with a newborn. I reckon I grow out of it around the 1.5 - 2 year mark. (which actually makes sense because that's when they are more resilient to germs etc, I think) hang on!

    p.s can you imagine my horror when the preschooler was a newborn *in the hospital still*, and my MIL popped her FINGER in his mouth to soothe him??!!! I think I actually cried.

  38. ha! i'm going to bookmark this post for when i have a baby someday :)

  39. Pregnancy makes you edgy. angry.

    Post partum blues make you weepy. depressed.

    And just when you think you're out of the clear, breastfeeding prolongs all the unusually high hormone levels. I literally couldn't think of anything else but my babe and her welfare when I was breastfeeding. I was so happy to be normal again when I finally stopped and could calm down. I still sometimes imagine that my toddler has stopped breathing inside her crib while she is sleeping, but I'm rational enough to tell myself that she is fine and sleeping soundly and not think about it anymore. Also, she doesn't look quite as fragile as a newborn anymore so that helps too.

  40. You crack me up. But I don't think you're crazy. You're a mom. Those are normal thoughts to have. Plus you just want your baby to be safe.
    Although I have wondered about the organic hand sanitizer being organic, if that makes it better or worse myself!

  41. you are crazy. and i'm so glad you're doing this before me.

  42. you might be crazy. but it's all just because you're crazy in love with your little man. and it's crazily cute so that's all ok.

    ahn, isn't amazing having friends "go before" when it comes to babies? it's like getting schooled by your friends first. :)


  43. for me it wasn't so much the germs but the floppy head and neck! i was sure my daughter was getting brain damage every time we hit a bump in the car.

    he's beautiful!

  44. bwa hahahaha. Did i tell you the story about me barking at some woman in the hospital that reached out to touch my little one's hand? I barked. snapped. stink eeye. LOVE you friend;

  45. I totally hear you about the hand sanitizer. If we're on a long car ride and I use that I keep thinking my poor darling (my girl is 9 weeks old), what if she needs to such on my finger to be soothed and she tastes the sanitizer!

  46. so, i just have to say thank you to all of you... i now know, i am not the only crazy out there! to the psych ward we ALL go!

    (and, i'm going to go wash my hands now, for the umpteenth time today)

  47. i'm just 23 weeks pregnant and already trying to protect my little babe from germs and bacteria and all the icky things that may be in non-organic produce and meat that's not 115% well done! i can't even imagine how crazy i'll be once she's born! i think (at least i hope) it's normal. :) don't worry!

  48. Bridget you're so speaking my language. Along with bringing the most joyful baby home, it also would seem that I brought along an anxiety disorder as well! Oh baby love.

  49. I do the same thing with my baby and he's my sixth (sixth newborn that is).


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(also! if you have a question, check back as i usually answer it here!)